Baggage is interesting. We all have it, it’s the managing of it that is the issue.
When we don’t take the time to work on our baggage before entering into a new relationship, that baggage shows up 100% of the time.
Let’s say your ex cheated on you…Whether you are consciously doing it or not, you are looking for the signs of it.
By searching for the signs you are treating your new girlfriend like she’s already done something wrong.
It’s a fight in the making.
No one likes being accused or suspected of doing anything wrong, especially cheating.
Baggage shows up in your relationship in many ways. Here are some examples of how it may show up:
- Trust Issues
- Not willing to open up
- One foot in and one foot out of the relationship
- Walls up
- Looking for things to go wrong
- Comparing to your ex
- Picking apart your new partner
- Looking for signs of what previously happened
Bringing your past into your new relationship and forward into your life, will cause you additional pain you don’t need and don’t have to have.
The way to get rid of baggage is paying attention to what you are thinking.
We don’t spend enough time paying attention to our own thoughts. Here is more on why this is so important.
Next, you need to learn the lessons presented to you.
In life, lessons keep showing up until you learn them. I’ve found after every situation, sitting down and figuring out the lessons helps to remove the past baggage. Here’s a post about learning the lessons.
Working on yourself is the hardest work you will ever do, but it’s worth walking into the next relationship clean and clear of your past heartache.
Benefits of working on yourself are, it allows you to find out who you are now, if your likes have changed, and you can reinvent yourself if you choose to.
We all evolve as humans over time, a breakup is the perfect excuse to work on you so you don’t bring your baggage into your next relationship.